Mindfulness in the West

Response to this article Mindfulness is something worse than just a smug middle-class trend which links from this one How 2014 became the Year of Mindfulness:

My strong opinion is that Buddhism is not a religion, it is a path to spirituality. However, I acknowledge that the Dalai Lama and other Buddhists call it a religion. But at no time did Buddha say 'Follow me'. There is a strong tendency in the West to confuse religion with spirituality.

I was in Plum Village with Thich Nhat Hanh (the Vietnamese monk who taught Jon Kabat-Zinn mindfulness), and during one  of his teachings he said that he had been asked if you could use mindfulness, of all things, in the army. His response was (my words, not his) - you cannot mindfully kill someone. Mindfulness is about peace in the world, not destruction. It is a way of life not a workplace strategy.

That is why, if you practise mindfulness (or try to) in your daily life rather than just when you are meditating, it changes everything, but very slowly. No quick fixes. The West ain't gonna like that! On another note, I find it very interesting that the West happily sucks what it wants from the East and then runs with it and makes money from it. The East doesn't sue, it's not in their mindset. They just accept that this is happening. I am thinking Buddhist philosophy specifically though.

An update! The director of Birdman or (The unexpected virtue of  ignorance) thanked Thich Nhat Hanh in the credits. How good is that? This act of acknowledgement makes up for all the other lacks. Thich Nhat Hanh thanked him in return.

On commitment

I found this poem by Goethe, and given that I have commitment issues in a number of areas based on fear (surprise!) here it is (ignore the 'man' stuff):

Until one is committed there is always hesitancy,

the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness,
there is one elementary truth,
the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans:
the moment one definitely commits oneself, then providence moves too.

All sorts of things occur to help that would never otherwise have occurred.

A whole stream of events issues from the decision,

Raising to one’s favor all manner of unforeseen accidents and meetings
And material assistance which no man could have dreamed

Would come his way.

Whatever you can do or dream you can begin it.

Boldness has genius, power and magic in it.

  

Daily practice - the social graces

Here is my take on increasing the social graces in your life, if other things take a hold (like busyness) or you have body and mind patterns/old habits you want to break. These aren't in any particular order; they represent a brainstorming session I had with myself. Perhaps that's another one - brainstorm with someone!

• Smile at someone (could be yourself)
• Thank someone (gratitude)
• Compliment someone
• Invite someone out - invent an outing for that person that you know they will enjoy (how nice is it to be included)
• Make eye contact
• Say hello to a stranger
• Start a conversation with a stranger (I've seen someone do this on the bus, and he is surprisingly good at it)
• When someone (could be a shop person) asks you how you are/how your day has been etc, ask them back
• Give someone your time/full attention
• Listen to someone mindfully (no other thoughts in your head)
• Tell someone that you care about them 
• Better still, show someone that you care
• Hug someone or otherwise give them affection (non threatening)
• Really look at someone as they are - don't take them for granted and think you 'see' them just because they are familiar
• Show/feel compassion for someone
• Try to imagine yourself in someone else's shoes
• Do something for someone without being asked
• Help someone or offer to help them (it can be a stranger)
• Commit a random act of kindness
• Pray for someone/wish them well
• Surprise someone with something quirky (eg a secret note)
• Give someone a present (this could just be your time)
• Try to make someone laugh
• Say something positive to someone
• Show interest in someone
• Be polite
• Speak with a pleasant voice
• Put a positive spin on something negative someone says
• Say something nice about someone to others
• Send love to someone with your eyes/heart
• Be friendly to someone
• Say you're sorry (too)
• Be punctual
• Say please and thankyou
• Be patient
• Show someone how to do something
• Put someone else first
• Be inclusive
• Commit a generous act
• Have fun with someone
• Make the most of the moment with someone
• Choose a friend
• Respect someone's personal space and belongings
• Be aware of others around you - focus off yourself
• Loan someone something
• Give someone something without an agenda
• Open your heart to someone
• Make something (eg a cake) with someone (a note on this: if you are side by side with someone rather than face to face, this can loosen up communication and take the pressure off always looking at them)

Amazing Indians

What is it about India that creates some amazing and inspiring to the point of tears social entrepreneurs? I think from the novels I have read, the news I have heard, and my own meagre travels (just 5 weeks) that it is either in the water (the Ganges is Mother) or it's the incredible inequality of Indian society. Or both, and more. Here are two, to name only a few.

Menstrual Man: this amazing man, humble and uneducated, was driven to empower poor women in rural India by inventing a machine that could make sanitary pads at a cheap cost that they could afford, and give them meaningful jobs that helped their communities at the same time. Read the full story - The Indian sanitary pad revolutionary (BBC).

Amlan Ganguly: creator of 'the revolutionary optimists'. He empowers slum children in Calcutta to change not only their own lives but those of the people around them - slum dwellers with no hope of a future. He started off as a lawyer but it was not his true calling. The children call him dada in this naturalistic and heart catching film about his work. View the film trailer and find out more.

There are more of course, and the greats like Mother Theresa and Ghandhi, but that is enough heroes for now!

A realisation while walking

Some people have realisations in the shower (I know of two) and others have them whilst walking/running. I am in that category - when walking.  Today I had a good one, worth noting. How many times do I think I will remember them, only to discover they have become hazy? Here it is.

This week I was reading a manual from a retreat I did in 2002. I remember this retreat well because of where I was at in my personal life and the emotions I felt whilst on retreat. There is nothing like emotion to sharpen your memory. Anyway, I was reading about how to find your sankalpa (a statement of intention to use one's will power to bring about a resolve). There were 5 steps in this process, the first one being:

In a calm and quiet place in body and mind bring back to life a moment in the past when you felt everything was right with you, aligned, simple, and you were one with the universe... When all felt well, at peace, when you felt clear, safe and strong.

Well, I thought, as usual I am stuck on step 1! But today whilst I was walking the lovely big black dog at the top of the beach, at the very last hour of the day, with a fresh but gentle breeze reminding me I was alive, I suddenly thought - why can't I just imagine this moment, here and now, is that moment, and that it is a present moment? Why don't I just imagine that this is how I feel in every moment? It seemed like a brainwave, and I am going to try it. Fake it until you make it, everyone tells me. Well, this is one thing very worth faking!

Get rid of that belly flab!

Some stomach muscle exercises for those who are keen. Giving up chocolate and pastries also helps but has to be weighed against life's small pleasures:

1. The plank: lie on your front with your hands next to your shoulders. Take a good breath and raise your whole body off the floor so you are supported by your arms. Hold this position for as long as you can. Lower yourself (or fall) to the floor. Full description
2. Sit ups: start sitting up, legs out in front, knees bent, hands on your knees (or on opposite shoulders), fingers together. Let hands slide up your legs as you slowly lower yourself back onto the floor. Breathe in as you go down. Breathe out as you come back up (slowly for maximum benefit and to prolong the agony) into a sitting position. Be careful to raise your head first to protect your neck. Repeat as many times as you can. Full description
3. Leg raisers: lie flat on your back and mentally prepare yourself for what is to come! Bring one leg towards your body (bent), then straighten and raise your leg towards the ceiling with your toes pointing towards you. Then slowly (of course) lower your leg back towards the floor, keeping it straight. When your leg is really close to the floor but not touching it, raise it back up again. Repeat this movement 10 times if you can, then do the same using the other leg. Then prepare for the worst - keeping the legs and feet together, raise both legs towards your body, then up towards the ceiling. Lower them slowly towards the floor. Try to do this 5 times. Full description

In each of these exercises, I have tried to choose a softer version to link to (yoga approach if possible) as some of us are not trying to be body builders, and the breathing during these potentially agonising exercises is important to me (and to staying alive). One doesn't want to strain one's heart!

World prayer - the Five Remembrances

Courtesy of Buddha:

I am of the nature to grow old. There is no way to escape growing old.  

I am  of the nature to have ill-health. There is no way to escape having ill-health. 

I am of the nature to die. There is no way to escape death. 

All that is dear to me and everyone I love are of the nature to change. There is no way to escape being separated from them. 

My actions are my only true belongings. I cannot escape the consequences of my actions. My actions are the ground on which I stand.

Put in context by Thich Nhat Hanh:

When you deny the reality of life, you appreciate it less. Meditate on the Buddha's Five Remembrances and rediscover the magic of life just as it is.

The stages of life, photo taken at Plum Village, France

New new year

Thich Nhat Hanh spoke of the new year in a beautiful video at the end of 2013 (although he points out that 2013 does not end, it is still with us). The video is called How to make your new year truly new. Apart from feeling an incredible open hearted love when I watched Thay give this talk, because his beautiful spirit shines through and is clearly visible (to me at least), I also noted some important points relevant to my life ( and really, everyone's life). Here they are:

• Aim to produce a feeling of joy and happiness every day in 2015 (or any/every year!)
• Take care of the painful feelings that arise - calm down, transform these into something else (compassion for myself, for others, for example)
• Improve the quality of my life through mindfulness
• Compassion will change my life and make it wonderful
• We all need a dream to nourish us and give life meaning - a sangha (spiritual community) helps us fulfill this dream (my dream is to be a fully functioning human being, by which I mean being in the world my true pure self)
• Go home to myself - care for my body and feelings with the energy of mindfulness. Restore peace and harmony within myself. Relieve the tension in my body
• Everyone has an island within themselves where they can feel calm and happy - be an island unto yourself and take refuge in yourself ('my island home')
• 'Breathing in, I am aware of my whole body, breathing out, I smile to my body' and 'Breathing in/out, I release the tension in my body' - practise all day long to release old body habits and their accompanying thought patterns
• Learn to go back to my body - 'Dear body, I am here for you' - our body is the first element of our true home
• The 5th and 6th breathing exercises are to create joy and happiness; the 7th and 8th exercises are to recognise the painful emotions. This is an energy; if you practise these exercises you generate another kind of energy. Every breath can calm down a painful feeling 
• The dharma (teachings) helps you to be at home inside
• Practise deep listening and loving speech every day